Because there’s nothing more important than properly introducing a character, here’s comedian Nick Di Paolo defending Louis CK in a 22-minute-long YouTube rant, where he not only blames the victims, but spends the first 90 seconds questioning the strength of any woman who is justifiably rattled by the fact that the first abuser who whips his d*ck out at her probably won’t be the last.
So, I don’t want to hear that you’re my equal, ladies, if you’re gonna f*cking say this traumatizes you the rest of your life, and you’re gonna have post-traumatic stress disorder, okay? You wanna serve in the military next to guys that have fought somebody, you see a dick you’re gonna be ruined the rest of your life? Let’s stop with that. Unless the guy locks the door, or you know, and it’s an assault, that type of- I can see that f*cking you up the rest of your life. But for Chrissakes, 25 years ago, this would’ve been a prank at a fraternity.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: Man, this guy sounds exactly like a Republican, and yup, he sure is! In fact, Nick Di Paolo is such a Republican that he encouraged school shooters to stop targeting high schools, and instead, murder liberal college professors, which resulted in him getting fired from Sirius XM, according to the Boston Globe. Again, like a typical Republican, Di Paolo didn’t revel in the beauty of the free market at work but opted to entrench himself even further in being an old white guy screaming about political correctness run amok. “These damn kids and their safe spaces!” cries the man demanding a safe space for his #FreeSpeech and his #FreeSpeech only with zero sense of irony. Ain’t America grand?
Anyway, all of this leads up to Di Paolo’s latest blunder where he flips off the image of a murdered Black Lives Matter activist in a promotional photo for his new comedy special.
The guy in the Black Lives Matter shirt is activist Muhiyidin Moye who was shot and killed last year. but yeh sure, use him as your prop in a shitty photoshop job to demonstrate how edgy and brave you are. pic.twitter.com/jMqc1xSdmg
— Sachi Ezura (@misstrionics) May 7, 2019
Obviously, none of that is good. But what’s even more ridiculous is Di Paolo’s apology and his explanation for how the whole thing happened.
I did not know that as I found it online in stock photos. Looking into changing it as we speak. My apologies.
Wow. Jesus Christ. “Sorry, everyone, I meant to tell a generic black guy who doesn’t want to be murdered by the police to go f*ck himself. Honest mistake!” is a hell of an apology to make. Not to mention the fact that Di Paolo is also flipping off images of various other minorities and a #MeToo like the strapping pillar of free speech that he is. Don’t tread on Nick, photographs!
The good news is that Di Paolo’s racist f*ck up has generated a decent amount of headlines, so anyone who steps up to defend him at this point is really tipping their hat to what kind of person they are. But who would do that?
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) May 8, 2019
Oh. Oh damn.
So maybe now’s a good time to suggest that people stop worshipping comics like they’re modern-day prophets. Don’t get me wrong, I f*cking love stand-up comedy, and some of it can be profound as hell. But at the end of the day, it’s just entertainment. Sure, some pros like Patton Oswalt are goddamn experts at their craft, but when you start tossing zealotry into the mix and treating comics like they’re the last defense against the King of England or some sh*t, that’s when things go sideways. It’s one thing to be clearly telling a controversial or offensive joke, which I have no problem with — if done well. (If not, you gambled and you lost. Walk it off.) It’s an entirely other thing to preach that women are nothing more than targets for wayward d*cks because that’s how it was when men were MEN. At that point, you’ve stopped being a comic.
You are the wayward d*ck.
Header Image Source: Getty